good god

Ben sent this in an email about being the mother of boys. Ouchie.

murphy's sick of his usual, i'll find something else...

Murphy's note home from school today was: "Murphy won't eat the cheese....Does he eat it at home?" I had sent in string cheese and apparently he is all out of snacks except the string cheese I sent. LOL.

Reminds me of the time my childhood friend Shanna met him. She kept calling his name and he kept ignoring her. She asked, "Are you sure that's his name?"

just filled out this survey (took forever)

3 things about me:

Three jobs (ANY 3) I have had in my life
1.customer service rep

2.Vacation Home Cleaner (in the Florida Keys-huge, beautiful, on the ocean homes).

3.clipping my grandma's nails ($2 a pop, booya!)

Three phrases you shout during the day:

1. Right Now! (impatience?)

2. Murphy, come here! (rinse and repeat)

3. PEACE! (this is my phone 'goodbye', and yes I shout it, although I don't think it's really a phrase).

Three phrases you wish you heard during the day:

1.I'll get that for you.

2.Sup, chubby?

3. Recycled plastic bottles, or organic sustainable?

Three things I would do with more money:

1. decorate my brand new lake home

2. Put my kids in private schools

3. spend till the money was gone

Three things I love to do without money:

1. nap (long ones)

2. fill up inflatable pools in backyard in summer

3. play super mario brothers (i'm just being honest)

Three things Im interested in:

1. Books on Asia (fiction, non-fiction, memoirs, autobiographies, biographies...)

2. decorating my house (no one else's)

3. my kids

Three things I do everyday when i wake:

1. pull my arm out from under Miyo, so I can get out of bed, while rubbing the gunk out of my eyes

2. Murphy's morning routine; peeing, dressing, brushing his teeth, putting on winter gear (currently), getting him outside for the bus (prying whatever food he has in his hands away so they'll let him on).

3. Diaper and clothing for Miyo, while making a pot of coffee (or recycling yesterday's) and overseeing Miles with his morning routine.

Three things I do everyday that I wish I didnt have to:

1. Wipe poop off of butts

2. wipe the bottom of my foot on my opposite pant leg to get the crumbs off of it

3.wash Miyo and Murphy's faces and hands after meals, and remind Miles to do it (more than once).

Three places I've lived

1.St. Paul

2. Minneapolis

3. Newport

Three places I'd rather live:

1. Chinatown, CA

2. Berkeley, CA

3. Seattle or Portland (either, cause they are so close together)

Three shows that I watch

1. Lost (the last two weeks have blown my mind, of course... I say that every new episode)

2. Ni Hao Kai Lan (Miyo is actually watching, but I'm usually around)

3. Secret Life of the American Teenager (it totally sucks, I know. but I loved when ricky picked up the baby next to a sleeping Amy in the season finale!)

Three movies I love to watch over and over:

1. Kill Bill I & II (you have to count them as one)

2. Royal Tenenbaums

3.Dr. Suess DVD's (I don't know about love, but if Murphy's on a binge of DVD's I prefer these to Baby Einstein or Finding Nemo).

Three of my favorite foods:

1.Pot Roast

2. Chinese: Cantonese & Mandarin/Vietnamese/Japanese... (I can't just choose one type)

3. Bananas (but I think I'm allergic-seriously-I get an itchy tongue after that lasts a long time)

Three things i do on my day off:

(from my kids? cause I don't do a 9 to 5)

1. go out to eat

2. sleep

3.stare off into nothing....

Three places I'd rather be right now:

1. Las Vegas (never been)

2. Mexico (never been)

3. watching my kids play in the summer sun (mmm...)

Three things i cannot live without

1. Ben

2. my babies

3. chapstick

Three items in your closet you need everyday to survive:

1. slippers

2. pajama pants

3. a bra

Three people you admire:

1. Nancy Morris

2. Alason McFarland

3. Nigella Lawson

Three people who message me regularly

1. shene

2. shene

3. shene

She knows I'm not really a text-er (I once lost my cell for 3 days and found it under Murphy's bed), so she never expects me to get it for sure- for sure.

ben says she gets it from me

my favorite gift ever (don't stop trying guys)

Meet Konishiki and Takamiyama:

When we were at the wharf, before we boarded our boat for whale watching, we looked in the little shops. We went into this place that had tons of theme salt and pepper shakers. I saw these little-big guys (above). I showed Ben and, stupidly, asked if I could buy them (instead of just purchasing them). It doesn't take a cashier at McDonald's to figure out that he didn't want to waste our money on salt and pepper shakers (because he is a punk). I was disappointed, but told the shop lady I would be back. I let her know I planned on harping on him during our 2.5 hour boat ride. I figured he'd cave, or I would be a Jezebel and take matters into my own hands.

Well, while we were waiting at the pier, the gal we were staying with (for free), who shuttled us around the Bay Area (from Sausalito ,to Pittsburgh, to Monterey, to Berkley, to Chinatown...), handed me a package. She said, "Will you hold this?", and then did some things with her backpack. After a while I remembered I was holding it and I said something to the affect of 'oh, I've still got your bag, here you go'. She says all nonchalant, "That's yours." I officially fell in love with her, kinda like how I fell in love with these two (who magnetize at the belly to become one!).

So, yes, I'm now complete. I don't think anyone could be happier. Serious.

i'm not only the mom, i'm also a client of the hilarity

MIYO:

Last night Ben was watching a Youtube video about the Oakland shootings on the BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit). The man reporting was black. Miyo was with Ben and she said, "Why you watchin' my Bawok Obama?"

MILES:

Last night Ben's sister Lisa was talking about a guy who was desperate for a date. Miles said to me, "If you were really cold and hard, you would date him and make fun of him, and then never see him again. Or maybe that's just Hanna." I laughed and then he told me, "Like, you know how people say, 'or maybe that's just me'."

crazy miyo 2 by 4 can't fit through the kitchen door

I am, again, at home with Miyo while the boys are at school. She is even funnier than I remembered her from a week ago. She keeps saying, "I hafa ask you a question." And then she doesn't ask me any questions. Sometimes she doesn't even say anything at all after.

She handed me a Capri Sun, so I took the wrapper off the straw. She took the straw and put it in her mouth, and made me punch the straw into the juice bag with the other end still in her mouth.

Last night Miles did something to her and she yelled, "You are in big trouble, man!"

Everything is "Hey Mom!" now.

She found the camera and pointed it at me and said, "Say cheese." Then later Miles was looking through pictures on it and she told him, "HEY! You don't touch mama's cramera!"

While I am typing this, she asked, "Oh, are you clickin'?"

Two weeks ago, she got out of bed and we heard her slippers padding to the living room, when Miles got out of bed and started to walk behind her. From the living room Ben and I heard her yell at him, "You get back in bed!"